Tales from the Transit Line
Fashion File from the Evening Commute:
One should never wear her brand new booties on the trek to her transit station or stop.
Fashionable footwear are not made for walking long distances and they are certainly not made for walking those distances at a fast pace, especially when late.
Further, they are not made for standing in a crowded car on a delayed train stuck on the tracks.
Now, here’s what’s trending:
#It’sNotEasyBeingBeautiful
Tales from the Transit Line
Report from the Evening Commute:
There is a need for more or longer SkyTrains servicing the Vancouver area, according to an elderly commuter in a crowded train car this evening.
“[But] we have Mickey Mouse leadership,” he said, blaming the lack of service on a government.
“[The train car] must be a pervert’s paradise,” he added, to a young lady who was squished between himself and a plexiglass partition.
Tales from the Transit Line
Report from the Evening Commute:
A study reveals that if a man proclaims loudly, on a busy SkyTrain, that he may still have “sperm” on his hands from the night before and then wonders out loud “what the strangers think of that” – he is an idiot.
That same study also reveals that if that same man then asks his traveling companion for a “smoochie smooch” – he is definitely an idiot.
Tales from the Transit Line
Eyewitness News from the Evening Commute:
A man gets on the bus at East Hastings and Main. He’s carrying a large black, lumpy garbage bag that clearly does not contain empty cans or bottles.
He is obviously in a hurry as he mutters “Don’t stop, don’t stop,” to the bus driver when he approaches yellow lights.
At one point, the man with the bag pulls out an orange spray bottle and sprays an odorless substance on his shoes.
His nails are black and appear as though he’s been digging in the dirt with his bare hands.
His head is shaven, but not cleanly.
He gets off the bus at Hastings and Cassiar, near the highway.
Tales from the Transit Line
Report from the Evening Commute:
A study has shown that if you pace frantically on the SkyTrain platform and then pull your own hair, while smiling happily – you will never be crowded on a busy train at rush hour.
Tales from the Transit Line
Report from the Evening Commute:
According to a commuter with a new piercing in her face, “if you put makeup on an open wound, it will get infected.”
Tales from the Transit Line
Report from the Evening Commute:
Ben with the super big Adam’s apple, who is kind of shy and quiet and not rowdy, can go to a tall cherry-haired young commuter’s party this weekend.
So can Connor and Jesse, because she misses ‘drinking with them’, but she won’t talk to Jesse.
No Grade 12s can go, but some people her friend knows from middle school are invited.
Christine is going, although the commuter ‘hates her.’
In related news, she’s going home right now to dye her hair.
Tales from the Transit Line
Report from the Evening Commute:
The most “unsettling feature” one commuter has seen on a person is someone who doesn’t blink.
“It’s unsettling, isn’t it!?” he said.
Tales from the Transit Line
Report from the Evening Commute:
A Gollum lookalike searched through contents of purse, that clearly did not belong to him, spread out the Stadium-Chinatown SkyTrain station platform. Not a transit police officer in sight.
In unrelated news, the Commercial-Broadway SkyTrain station platform was flooded with about a dozen transit police officers, checking riders for proof of purchase and issuing fare-evasion tickets.
Tales from the Transit Line 