Posts Tagged ‘Translink’

Tales from the Transit Line

Report from the Morning Commute:

Today is the annual Translink Clean the Stairwell at Brentwood Station Day, either that or someone puked all over it last night – it was pub night at SFU, after all.

To celebrate, it is being recommended that commuters put their trash and puke in the bin today [tonight].

Tales from the Transit Line

Report from the Evening Commute:

Researchers have discovered a new way to tell if a woman is pregnant, according to two Translink commuters.

“How did you know,” asked the first expert, surprised by the news that a mutual friend was expecting.

“I know she has a personal trainer,” replied her conspiratorial colleague, “so when I saw she was gaining weight, I just knew.”

Tales from the Transit Line

Report from the Morning Commute:

An enterprising young commuter on the Millennium Line, this morning, has proved that if one sits and twists a Rubik’s Cube in different directions for 18 minutes, without looking at it, absolutely nothing will happen.

In unrelated news, we would like to wish all of our loyal readers and critics, a very happy New Year!

Tales from the Transit Line

Report from the Morning Commute:

A woman’s animal instincts kicked in this morning, as she marked her territory in a Translink train car.

The woman splashed kisses and rubbed herself all over a pigeon-toed man wearing women’s jeans and a black leather jacket.

“It was all very unnecessary,” reported our on-scene correspondent, who now, incidentally, is seeking treatment for post-traumatic stress disorder.